#Doug…
* Has never seen The Godfather
* Doesn’t wear watches
* Has never been in a Turkish Prison
* Never seems to be able to hold on to a good pair of pants
* Always wants to fasten his seat belt when sitting in front of his computer
* Doesn’t own a car
* Is suspicious of overly friendly strangers
* Does not shave with a straight razor
* Always attempts to put his boxers on the right way